Put the oven gloves down... here’s where to find the best Christmas dinners in London

If you’re more Henry VIII (minus the beheadings) than Keith Floyd and would rather spend your time gobbling, slurping and getting an Uber home, than drunkenly sweating, chopping, braising, roasting, boiling, stuffing and losing your appetite on the Big Day, we’ve got you, because whatever your tastes, there’s a slap-up Chrimbo meal for everyone.

Those seeking the highly traditional should look no further than The Guinea Grill for much cholesterol-raising goodness. Park yourself in the ye olde-worldy dining room among the antique furnishings for a five-course sensation (£150) where meat eaters can dine on turkey ballotine, beef or lamb accompanied by all the trimmings, including cauliflower cheese, Brussels sprouts with bacon and chestnuts and minted peas. Plus for afters, there’s Christmas pudding with brandy custard, of course.

For an equally indulgent extravaganza, try Booking Office 1869 for its six-course multi-meaty feast (£140), serving brioche and truffle stuffing, venison pigs in blankets and a honking cheese board.

Meanwhile, if you’re looking for an unconventional but wholly delicious treat, get yourself to three Michelin-starred Alain Ducasse at The Dorchester for a six-course menu and wine pairing (£390), featuring chestnut velouté with pheasant and black truffle, duck foie gras terrine with pickled walnut and artichoke, hand-dived scallop and turbot with razor clams and parsnips and a jazzy interpretation of the Yule log.

Or, go completely off-kilter with a more affordably priced trip to Rasa Sayang in Chinatown, where you can sink your teeth into Singapore chilli crab, laksa and Hainanese chicken, because — why not?